tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-54554473711309593082024-03-15T18:13:08.873-07:00Break Out from Limiting Beliefs with Mandy EvansInfinite opportunities for success and happiness await when you break out from the limiting beliefs that hold you back.Mandy Evanshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07873828245677538118noreply@blogger.comBlogger249125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5455447371130959308.post-35279260979645534182024-03-09T12:32:00.000-08:002024-03-09T12:32:08.078-08:00Peace in the Face of Hatred<p> Do you ever feel overwhelmed by your daily dose of of bad news?</p><p><span style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-family: "Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18.75px; white-space-collapse: preserve;">When I feel disheartened by the hatred, cruelty and greed (especially for power) in our world, the only thing I know to do is focus on what I want instead. Kindness. Generosity. Love. Compassion, Peace. I try to extend some.</span></p><p><span style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-family: "Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18.75px; white-space-collapse: preserve;">Doing my small part to create the world I want feels so much better than despair or anger toward those who damage others. I don't wish those people harm or suffering -- just out of power and unable to hurt others. </span></p><p><span style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-family: "Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18.75px; white-space-collapse: preserve;">The courage and strength required to confront suffering without being demoralized reminds me of our civil rights leader, John Lewis, who invited us to get into some good trouble. </span></p><p><span style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-family: "Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18.75px; white-space-collapse: preserve;">So let's also stand up when we can. Maybe not in front of a tank, but</span><span style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-family: "Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18.75px; white-space-collapse: preserve;"> </span><span style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-family: "Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18.75px; white-space-collapse: preserve;">In conversation, </span><span style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-family: "Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18.75px; white-space-collapse: preserve;">even if it ruffles a few feathers.</span><span style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-family: "Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18.75px; white-space-collapse: preserve;"> Voting. Protesting injustice and cruelty. Contributing to worthy causes </span></p><p><span style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-family: "Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18.75px; white-space-collapse: preserve;">If the plight of innocent people in war zones, or those who are homeless and hungry tugs at your heart so hard it threatens to overwhelm you, I hope this will help. </span></p><p><span style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-family: "Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18.75px; white-space-collapse: preserve;"></span></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEiks20F93aH36AYxBix4H67KUm54Xe9guVhfDwKlgMKfDwrASmG9QH19yArz9dKLNnt2TFCrXp75HMo-etdAzJdFRfAI-E7zFI4XNG3zpxaoz7kpbF3x9OO04clEdEHXfsUeIvhEBbsyONCFkin3QsCudWJknNr2AZfWSZMkSvm8yszFhD-PhHIdwndfmFZ" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="500" data-original-width="500" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEiks20F93aH36AYxBix4H67KUm54Xe9guVhfDwKlgMKfDwrASmG9QH19yArz9dKLNnt2TFCrXp75HMo-etdAzJdFRfAI-E7zFI4XNG3zpxaoz7kpbF3x9OO04clEdEHXfsUeIvhEBbsyONCFkin3QsCudWJknNr2AZfWSZMkSvm8yszFhD-PhHIdwndfmFZ" width="240" /></a></div><br /><p></p><p>Love, </p><p>Mandy</p>Mandy Evanshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07873828245677538118noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5455447371130959308.post-33962391316852980802023-12-18T11:48:00.000-08:002023-12-18T11:48:53.472-08:00Happiness on Sale!<p><i>Emotional Options: A Handbook for Happiness</i> is on sale during this Amazon Kindle Countdown deal. Starting 12/18/23 through 12/22/23 it is just 99 cents. That's 7 for the price of one! <span style="text-align: center;">Kindle books can be read on any device.</span></p><p style="text-align: center;">Here's the link for reviews, info and orders:</p><p style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://www.amazon.com/s?k=emotional+options+mandy+evans&crid=2TOLFL143H8I3&sprefix=emotional+options%2Caps%2C163&ref=nb_sb_ss_ts-doa-p_1_17" target="_blank">Emotional Options 99 Cents</a><br /></p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgg5CWFWyHK1m-SFuMvzBva3XwMWNQiMak-OzYTbMEl1CQCjAIRA939-WoO8Smpxp9T4GY-xQRV57FOe-0I4Bwpouu3sOicx5r5xAfeZEKo2Zaw--oInhr8iKHyd3yxbk1V6n4o6_wUwPZ6Ic1w4pIpAgeNY7s1Pzc2orf4qow26qxzWnta7D_piFzb3EMi" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="218" data-original-width="141" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgg5CWFWyHK1m-SFuMvzBva3XwMWNQiMak-OzYTbMEl1CQCjAIRA939-WoO8Smpxp9T4GY-xQRV57FOe-0I4Bwpouu3sOicx5r5xAfeZEKo2Zaw--oInhr8iKHyd3yxbk1V6n4o6_wUwPZ6Ic1w4pIpAgeNY7s1Pzc2orf4qow26qxzWnta7D_piFzb3EMi" width="155" /></a></div><br /><p></p><div><span style="text-align: left;">If you are looking for a meaningful holiday gift, for yourself or people you care about, I hope you will consider this book that has helped so many people to be happier </span><i style="text-align: left;">now.</i><span style="text-align: left;"> </span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;">Headlines from the last 3 reviews, all 5 stars:</div><div style="text-align: left;"><ul style="text-align: left;"><li><span color="rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.87)" style="background-color: white; font-size: 13px;"><b><span style="font-family: arial;">Simple and profound</span></b></span></li><li><span color="rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.87)" style="background-color: white; font-size: 13px;"><b><span style="font-family: arial;">No-Fluff Guide Gives You Tools to Unlock Happiness... MUST READ!!</span></b></span></li><li><span color="rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.87)" style="background-color: white; font-size: 13px;"><b><span style="font-family: arial;">Emotional Freedom Is Available To Everyone</span></b></span></li></ul></div><div style="text-align: left;">Happy Holidays. </div><div style="text-align: left;">Happy giving. </div><div style="text-align: left;">Many Blessings.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">With love, </div><div style="text-align: left;">Mandy</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><p></p><p></p><p> </p>Mandy Evanshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07873828245677538118noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5455447371130959308.post-16617195693691644052023-12-10T12:27:00.000-08:002023-12-13T12:29:50.609-08:00Celebrate Your Mistakes!<p style="text-align: center;"> Celebrate what?!? Mistakes? Why would anyone want to do that? Because:</p><div style="text-align: center;"><b> You cannot recognize a mistake unless you just</b><b> learned something useful.</b> </div><p>For example, I did two Breakout Coaching sessions with a man who wanted to launch his own business, but he was afraid. A few years and several million dollars later he invited me to an interview on his new podcast. During our recording he explained how he knew me. </p><p>He said, <i>She asked me some questions no one had ever asked me before. When I heard my own answers I thought, "But that's just so stupid!"</i></p><p>He announced it gleefully, as if he had just received a wonderful surprise gift. He had. He had given it to himself; I just helped to unwrap the package. </p><p>I'll let you know when the interview airs and you can hear his gleeful proclamation yourself.</p><p>But what if the mistake you discover is a belief you have held, maybe for decades, that has blocked your happiness or limited your success? You can regret those erroneous years or celebrate your breakout to newfound freedom. </p><p>If fear of failure or reluctance to make a mistake holds you back from following your heart's desire, don't just take my word for it. Michael Jordan, one of the greatest athletes of all time says:</p><p><span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: Georgia, Cambria, "Times New Roman", Times, serif; font-style: italic; text-align: center;">"I’ve missed more than 9,000 shots in my career. I’ve lost almost 300 games. Twenty-six times I’ve been trusted to take the game-winning shot and missed. I’ve failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed."</span></p><div style="text-align: left;"><b style="color: red;">Here's to your mistakes! Let's celebrate!</b></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">With love, <br />Mandy</div><p><br /></p><p><br /></p>Mandy Evanshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07873828245677538118noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5455447371130959308.post-76810485391398062212023-10-21T14:02:00.001-07:002023-10-22T13:44:14.804-07:00What Is Your Purpose?<p>Around 1975 I took the est training in NYC. Many of the upheavals I experienced and insights I gained guide me still. Among them this question stands out. </p><p style="text-align: center;"><b>What is your purpose in life?</b> </p><p>When I heard that, astounded, I wondered how I had reached my thirties without ever even <i>considering</i> such a important question! What on earth were we here <i>for? </i>Not only that, I did not know one single person who had pondered it either. How could we all dance or trudge our way through the days of our lives with no concept of what for?</p><p>My answer came quickly and clearly, in a blend of discovery and choice. </p><p style="text-align: center;"><b>My purpose is to help people to be happier and ease suffering.</b></p><p> I tried it on. It fit. It still does, growing and changing shape as I have done over many years. </p><p>Knowing my purpose serves as a north star whenever I get lost. When I cannot for the life of me figure out what to do next, all I have to do while I wait for direction is remain true to my purpose:</p><p></p><ul style="text-align: left;"><li>Be kind </li><li>Offer a service.</li><li>Encourage someone </li><li>Contribute to a worthy cause</li><li>Thank someone for something</li><li>Write a blog post that may help someone to breakout out from a painful emotion and feel better </li></ul><p></p><p>So here we go, <b>what is <i>your</i> purpose?</b> If you could have your precious life be <i>for</i> something, what would you like that to be? For many of us, our purpose will change from time to time. It does not have to be grand or altruistic. It could be anything from simply making it through a tough time to contributing to world peace. Enjoying the gift of life sounds like a good one to me. The important thing is to choose -- to be consciously aware of what on earth your are here <i>for.</i> </p><p>I would love to hear about your choices and experiences and share them with others here. Your comments are always an appreciated gift. </p><p>Wishing you a happy purposeful life.</p><div style="text-align: left;">Love, <br />Mandy</div>Mandy Evanshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07873828245677538118noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5455447371130959308.post-51927870259181378012023-07-14T13:05:00.001-07:002023-07-14T13:08:57.253-07:00Why I Love Writers<p><span style="background-color: white; font-size: 19.58px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">They say writers only need one tool, a seat-belt! A grimmer version explains how to write a book, "You just stare at a blank piece of paper until blood pours out of your eyes."</span></span></p><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br style="background-color: white; font-size: 19.58px;" /><strong style="background-color: white; font-size: 19.58px;">Thank you dear writers for:</strong><br style="background-color: white; font-size: 19.58px;" /></span><ul style="background-color: white; font-size: 19.58px;"><li><span style="font-family: inherit;">The hours you spend alone</span></li><li><span style="font-family: inherit;">The courage to share your creation</span></li><li><span style="font-family: inherit;">The joy and wisdom you have given us</span></li><li><span style="font-family: inherit;">Opening our hearts and minds to new thoughts</span></li><li><span style="font-family: inherit;">Explaining things I would never understand without you</span></li><li><span style="font-family: inherit;">Helping me to make it through the night more than once -- a lot more than once</span></li><li><span style="font-family: inherit;">Making me laugh out loud</span></li><li><span style="font-family: inherit;">Allowing me to cry when I could not</span></li><li><span style="font-family: inherit;">Getting me through my childhood</span></li><li><span style="font-family: inherit;">Teaching me about compassion</span></li><li><span style="font-family: inherit;">Helping me to learn the "how to" of so many things</span></li><li><span style="font-family: inherit;">Daring to face the harshest, most snide criticism some people can dish out</span></li><li><span style="font-family: inherit;">Sharing the secrets of your very soul that your words reveal</span></li><li><span style="font-family: inherit;">Creating worlds of wonder for us to travel in and characters we remember for life</span></li><li><span style="font-family: inherit;">Filling me with hope</span></li><li><span style="font-family: inherit;">Making the would richer, finer, and more accessible to so many people</span></li><li><span style="font-family: inherit;">Letting me to dare to join your ranks!</span></li></ul><span style="background-color: white; font-size: 19.58px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><b>I love you so dearly. Thank you so deeply.</b></span></span><div><span style="background-color: white; font-family: Georgia, serif; font-size: 19.58px;"><br /></span></div>Mandy Evanshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07873828245677538118noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5455447371130959308.post-9444213421464207622023-02-14T16:39:00.001-08:002023-02-14T16:39:54.778-08:00Surviving Valentine's Day or What Do You Want Instead?<p>Feeling kind of glum on Valentine's Day, no chocolates, no flowers no cards; I reverted to an old default state, unloved and unwanted. I did one thing I know to do when I feel that way -- be kind. I sent out e-cards and emails. Tweeted a link to a free talk I gave called "Beliefs About Love." </p><p>While I took a shower and washed my hair I remembered the <i>other</i> thing. If you don't like the way it is, figure out what you want instead and focus on that. Kaboom! My son called from Costa Rica to wish me a Happy Valentine's Day and my dear neighbor left this wild and wonderful bouquet of flowers. </p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEg_6kOVOU9pRO39abLFW68Hzkt24gDXa_XBjQxmByeo5TSZ7Fh24jnInnuWMY13GVwEex13fC0eFc7s_LUpa9cQze2MyCPQoCYgw1WWhriutD2azDMxTqGi5Tbcscm6ZhLvh7TWK7TnkdQROOXL1iiRQ4ghWld9IyNZ7PXmUQ12wyRTEB7kPNynT9744w" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="2048" data-original-width="2048" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEg_6kOVOU9pRO39abLFW68Hzkt24gDXa_XBjQxmByeo5TSZ7Fh24jnInnuWMY13GVwEex13fC0eFc7s_LUpa9cQze2MyCPQoCYgw1WWhriutD2azDMxTqGi5Tbcscm6ZhLvh7TWK7TnkdQROOXL1iiRQ4ghWld9IyNZ7PXmUQ12wyRTEB7kPNynT9744w" width="240" /></a></div><br />My mailbox filled up with sweet thoughts and a dear friend called with a dinner invitation. <p></p><p>You probably have heard me say it before, that bit about <i>what you want instead</i>. If you are anything like me, you could use a reminder now and then though. </p><p style="text-align: center;"><b>If you feel bad about something, figure out what you want instead and focus on that because what you focus on grows!</b></p><p style="text-align: left;">Wishing you love and happiness on Valentine's Day, the day after, and always, </p><p style="text-align: left;">Mandy</p><p><br /></p>Mandy Evanshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07873828245677538118noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5455447371130959308.post-84579112762327238582022-12-27T12:48:00.000-08:002022-12-27T12:48:48.848-08:00What You Resist Persists!<p>Ever hear that saying "What you resist persists"? Here's how it works. </p><p>I knew two sisters, both in their sixties, maybe early seventies, who lived together in Palm Springs. Though one sister had pretty serious memory problems, there was one thing she could still do. She could crochet. And did she ever. She especially liked to make covers for tissue boxes, kind of Kleenex caddies. </p><p>One year she gave me one for Christmas. The trouble with those gifts is that if you want to be kind, you sort of have to display them when your gifting friend visits, whether <i>you</i> like them or not. I said thank you, but I did not truly feel grateful. You can probably tell by now that I am not a big fan of crocheted tissue box covers.</p><p>The very next week, my cleaning lady gave me another one. It was crocheted and also bejeweled. And she came to visit every two weeks! I began to feel unfairly badgered by box covers. I remember thinking, "You better get over it before you have <i>three</i> of them!" </p><p>I must not have succeeded with that getting over it because the next week when I went to visit my sister friends, as I was leaving, my forgetful friend stopped me to say, "Wait, I have something for you!" Quick as a wink, I was the resistant owner of<i> three</i> perfectly crocheted tissue box covers. </p><p>Not exactly an earth shattering example, but such a clear one of something that <i>is</i> important. In that mysterious Law of Attraction what you focus on grows. And what you resist truly persists. If there is something in your life you do not like, instead of resisting, resenting, even raging against it, look to see what you would like instead. Focus on that and watch that grow. </p><p>Notice how much time and energy you spend on what you <i>don't</i> want versus how much you expend on what you <i>do</i> want to move toward or attract to you. Watch out what you grow with your focused energy or you may end up with a whole life full of things you don't like.</p><p>May you fill your life wonderful experiences and enjoy lots of happy adventures. </p><div style="text-align: left;">Love, <br />Mandy</div><p>PS To learn more read <i>Travelling Free: How to Recover from the Past by Changing your Beliefs</i> and <i>Emotional Options: A Handbook for Happiness</i> <b>on sale now for 99 cents each until the end of the 2022 at <a href="http://amazon.com">amazon.com</a>.</b></p><p><br /></p><p> </p>Mandy Evanshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07873828245677538118noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5455447371130959308.post-76314768057613640502022-12-25T09:44:00.003-08:002023-12-13T13:00:07.357-08:00Books on Sale for 99 Cents in 2022<p> Both of my books, "Travelling Free: How to Recover from the Past" and "Emotional Options: A Handbook for Happiness" are on sale now at for .99 cents each! The sale only lasts until the end of the year so don't wait.</p><p style="text-align: center;"><a href="Info and Orders">https://www.amazon.com</a></p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEh4H1kHTGI12WUtLUE3uVBAAc_cbZFlphlvsQg4e82k0nuOJwuSRYgU4HI5m503seqChN-HQ54QAb8Wg0_BoJGc5YtT6S6mSwIfq-uf2Lzv0VS0GkKy5FMEsLSF-udfxWphCjvt3IRRh-qqsBhYXPIHVUswtXm--66LgYbLzxTVbRl-tlVa4kYK1uZpJw" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="1433" data-original-width="1613" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEh4H1kHTGI12WUtLUE3uVBAAc_cbZFlphlvsQg4e82k0nuOJwuSRYgU4HI5m503seqChN-HQ54QAb8Wg0_BoJGc5YtT6S6mSwIfq-uf2Lzv0VS0GkKy5FMEsLSF-udfxWphCjvt3IRRh-qqsBhYXPIHVUswtXm--66LgYbLzxTVbRl-tlVa4kYK1uZpJw" width="270" /></a></div><br />Wishing you great happiness and full recovery from tough times in your past that still affect you now.<p></p><p>Happy holidays.</p><p>Love, </p><p>Mandy</p>Mandy Evanshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07873828245677538118noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5455447371130959308.post-33212678437681748162022-12-21T10:28:00.001-08:002022-12-21T10:28:26.800-08:00When the Holidays are Sad<div style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: medium;"><span style="background-color: white;">During these days some hearts are happy and light. Other hearts are breaking. If you or someone you know finds the season a challenge this year, I hope this will help. It is an article based on my time as a home-based hospice volunteer in Ulster County, NY. It is the first writing I ever sold, published in </span><i style="background-color: white;">The LA Times</i><span style="background-color: white;">. </span></span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: medium;"><span style="background-color: white;"><br /></span></span></div><div class="post-body entry-content" id="post-body-4535448945628980713" itemprop="articleBody" style="background-color: white; font-family: Georgia, serif; line-height: 1.6em; margin: 0px 0px 0.75em;"><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size: medium;">Posted with extra love, </span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size: medium;">Mandy</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="font-size: 19.58px;"><br /></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="font-size: 19.58px;"><b style="font-size: 19.58px;"><span face="arial, "sans-serif"" style="font-size: 16pt;">Trust Yourself in Handling Sad Holidays</span></b></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="font-size: 19.58px;"><br /></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="font-size: 19.58px;">As people unwrapped Christmas presents and basted turkeys, one small 10-year-old girl watched her mother die. The three years' battle with bone cancer ended. By noon angry voices filled the apartment. Relatives argued bitterly about who would take care of her now.</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="font-size: 19.58px;"><br /></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="font-size: 19.58px;">Kate (not her real name) looked at the stack of cards on the coffee table, addressed to her mother, father, and family. The writers had not known that her father had left months ago. 'Tis the season to be jolly! The world's bustle and good cheer pressed in from all sides.<br /><br /><b>If for you this season of sharing brings loss—of a loved one, your health, a job, your sense of well-being—the following suggestions may help.</b></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="font-size: 19.58px;"><ul style="text-align: left;"><li>Trust yourself. You may not have a lot of answers now, but you can learn them with time. Even when you request advice, it's you who decides which advice is good and which is foolish. You are wiser than you think.</li><li>Ask for what you want from friends, family, professionals. Only you know what's best for you. Those who care about you will most likely welcome the information. If, for example, you dread spending New Year's Eve alone but you aren't sure if you want to accept an invitation, you may want to ask if you can decide at the last minute, or see if a friend would be willing to spend the time with you doing what you think best from moment-to-moment.</li><li>Allow your feelings to change. You need not concern yourself about logic or consistency. No one has ever faced <i>your</i> situation and there are no rules. Permit your emotions to come and go; they will change as your beliefs do.</li><li>Let others take responsibility for their feelings. Some people, in their love and concern for you, will want you to "cheer right up" or "let it all out, now" so that they can feel OK. You don't have to. Spend time with people who are most comfortable with you, however you are.</li><li>Reminisce if you want to. Share memories with friends and family. Write things down or daydream. Fond memories heal deep wounds. People only dwell on matters they never complete. Your thoughts will move on when you are ready.</li><li>Be very kind to yourself. Your natural desire to take care of yourself and those you love will guide you far better than harsh self-disciplines. I once asked someone what she was afraid would happen if she followed her desire "to lie on the couch and hug my pillow all day." "I might never get up!" she yelled at me—and she got up.</li><li>Share from your heart. What you see, feel and learn during this period of heightened sensitivity is unique. It has value. Communicating about your experience to those who are open creates new bonds and strengthens old ones.</li><li>Organizations such as Hospice, crises centers, and self-help groups can be good sources support.</li></ul></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="font-size: 19.58px;"><b style="font-size: 19.58px;">When someone you care about is dealing with grief during the holidays:</b></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="font-size: 19.58px;"><ul style="text-align: left;"><li>Maintain contact. Of course, you don't know what to do or what to say. You get 10 points for showing up. If you are embarrassed, your friend probably is too. Share that. Listening without judgment relieves more pain than all the helpful advice you can muster. You probably don't really know what your loved one should do anyway.</li><li>If distance prevents a visit or you really can't handle it, write. If you don't know what to say, just say that you care. It will mean as much as flowing prose.</li><li>Ask what you can do. Make your offer specific. "Would you like to go out to dinner?" or "May I pick up the kids?" means a lot more than the next-to-worthless, "Call me if you need anything." People who are in pain often find it hard to reach out, especially if the do not know what you want to do for them.</li><li>Permit your friend to be unreasonable. Life makes little sense to him (or her) right now. Trust that he is doing the best he can. His reactions to you or the situation have little or nothing to do with you; avoid taking them personally. Offer your patience and understanding as a gift, the most valuable one you have.</li><li>Invite her (or him) to any event you usually would. "But won't it be awkward?" seems a poor reason to exclude someone who is going through a rough time. Respect her wishes. She may not want to attend, but offer the opportunity and support in case she's worried about it too.</li><li>Include memories in your conversation if you both want to. "It's feeling that I can't talk about her anymore that's the hardest," a bereft mother stated. I want to remember the times we laughed and watched her grow, especially on holidays. People act as if she never existed, as if we stopped loving her. I feel more alone then."</li><li>Follow your heart; it's wiser than your mind in matters of compassion. You may feel helpless; may even be helpless. It's OK to cry together. If your tears turn to laughter, that's fine too.</li></ul></div><br /><div class="MsoNormal" style="font-size: 19.58px;">When December 25 came again to 11-year-old Kate, her older sister asked what she wanted to do. "I think we should have an extremely large tree, with lots of presents under it, mostly for me," she replied, "and I think we should have a very good time." In her short number of years, Kate had found a lot of answers—herself.</div><div style="clear: both; font-size: 19.58px;"></div></div><div class="post-footer" style="background-color: white; color: #940f04; font-family: "Trebuchet MS", Trebuchet, Arial, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 16px; font-stretch: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; letter-spacing: 0.1em; line-height: 1.4em; margin: 0.75em 0px; text-transform: uppercase;"><div class="post-footer-line post-footer-line-1"><span class="post-author vcard">POSTED BY <span class="fn"><a href="https://www.blogger.com/profile/07873828245677538118" itemprop="author" rel="author" style="color: #0066cc; text-decoration-line: none;" title="author profile">MANDY EVANS </a></span></span><span class="post-timestamp">AT <a class="timestamp-link" href="https://beliefbreakout.blogspot.com/2013/12/handling-sad-holidays.html" itemprop="url" rel="bookmark" style="color: #0066cc; text-decoration-line: none;" title="permanent link"><abbr class="published" itemprop="datePublished" style="border: none;" title="2013-12-23T15:33:00-08:00">3:33 PM</abbr></a> </span><span class="post-comment-link"></span><span class="post-icons"><span class="item-action"><a href="https://www.blogger.com/email-post.g?blogID=5455447371130959308&postID=4535448945628980713" style="color: #940f04;" title="Email Post"><img alt="" class="icon-action" height="13" src="https://img1.blogblog.com/img/icon18_email.gif" style="border: 1px solid rgb(17, 89, 60); 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background-clip: initial; background-color: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: -60px 0px; background-repeat: no-repeat; background-size: initial; background: url("/img/share_buttons_20_3.png") -60px 0px no-repeat !important; color: #0066cc; display: inline-block; height: 20px; margin-left: -1px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; text-decoration-line: none; width: 20px;" target="_blank" title="Share to Facebook"><span class="share-button-link-text" style="display: block; text-indent: -9999px;">SHARE TO FACEBOOK</span></a><a class="goog-inline-block share-button sb-pinterest" href="https://www.blogger.com/share-post.g?blogID=5455447371130959308&postID=4535448945628980713&target=pinterest" style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-color: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: -100px 0px; background-repeat: no-repeat; background-size: initial; background: url("/img/share_buttons_20_3.png") -100px 0px no-repeat !important; color: #0066cc; display: inline-block; height: 20px; margin-left: -1px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; text-decoration-line: none; width: 20px;" target="_blank" title="Share to Pinterest"><span class="share-button-link-text" style="display: block; text-indent: -9999px;">SHARE TO PINTEREST</span></a></div></div></div>Mandy Evanshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07873828245677538118noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5455447371130959308.post-50767350989445988642022-11-22T09:40:00.004-08:002022-11-23T07:26:40.636-08:00Gratitude Is Happy Awareness<p>Despite what your elders may have said, <b>gratitude is not just a duty</b>, a life-time burden. Of course it is polite to say thank to acknowlege gifts and favors, but just saying the words is not the same as <i>feeling</i> grateful. </p><p><b>Gratitude is the happy awareness of blessings</b>, like love, warmth, sharing good food or a quiet time alone. I think it should be spelled <u>greatfull</u> -- knowing all the greatness we are full of. </p><p><b>Express gratitude and watch it grow</b> as if sharing were a magic fertilizer. When I lived in Carlsbad, CA, on the Thursday before Thanksgiving, I hosted a thanks giving evening. The invitation always read "Bring something to share, something to say, or just come as you are." We enjoyed the goodies people brought then gathered in a circle to tell each other what we were grateful for in our lives. Tears and laughter and many a "me too, oh I forgot that one!" followed. Most people took several turns.</p><p style="text-align: left;">So as I bake my cranberry walnut pie this year for a gathering with neighbors, I am grateful for:</p><ul style="text-align: left;"><li>Life </li><li>Love</li><li>My dear family</li><li>Work I still enjoy Breakout Coaching after all of these years</li><li>Wonderful books and those who spend the long isolated hours to write them</li><li>My sweet desert home</li><li>The dearly departed I miss so much</li><li>You! I am very grateful to share these thoughts with you. Thank you. </li></ul><p></p><p>That's just a beginning. Shall we make it grow? I would love to know what you are grateful this year. Please use POST A COMMENT below if you'd like share your list or your thoughts.</p><p>Wishing you many blessings and great-full-ness!</p><p>With love, </p><p>Mandy</p>Mandy Evanshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07873828245677538118noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5455447371130959308.post-82843993076225503312022-02-14T10:37:00.002-08:002022-02-14T10:37:57.464-08:00Happy Valentine's Day<p style="text-align: center;"> <span style="font-size: large;">Happy Valentine's Day to you!</span><span style="color: red; font-size: large;"> </span></p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEg9KsHPqfbSyWvGaCXqrLjEWHS0Ujglo7Xtygakj1rEB7ijzoewem68QQguqY3XENZaityL-v1He2WpmKcj1DOH5PlxswOwAUMVgJAk55upCIGL76NzqnADfhzIcj0_unZDpczOKCWLMxQOwSCisHw6AK2HaADmTxCJbqmzSqSwG4iSF55XSSynNGJd9Q" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="483" data-original-width="612" height="377" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEg9KsHPqfbSyWvGaCXqrLjEWHS0Ujglo7Xtygakj1rEB7ijzoewem68QQguqY3XENZaityL-v1He2WpmKcj1DOH5PlxswOwAUMVgJAk55upCIGL76NzqnADfhzIcj0_unZDpczOKCWLMxQOwSCisHw6AK2HaADmTxCJbqmzSqSwG4iSF55XSSynNGJd9Q=w477-h377" width="477" /></a></div><span style="font-size: medium;"><br /></span><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-size: medium;">Time to put a little love in your heart. <span style="text-align: left;">If that's a challenge today, review your "Beliefs About Love" they may be blocking cupid's arrow. </span></span><a href="https://www.mandyevans.com/beliefs-about-love/" style="font-size: large;">https://www.mandyevans.com/beliefs-about-love/</a></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-size: medium;">Sending love, </span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-size: medium;">Mandy</span></div><p></p>Mandy Evanshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07873828245677538118noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5455447371130959308.post-54162611048319716482022-02-02T10:45:00.000-08:002022-02-02T10:45:04.339-08:00Open that Gate<div style="font-family: inherit;"><div class="" dir="auto" style="font-family: inherit;"><div class="ecm0bbzt hv4rvrfc ihqw7lf3 dati1w0a" data-ad-comet-preview="message" data-ad-preview="message" id="jsc_c_gd" style="font-family: inherit; padding: 4px 16px 16px;"><div class="j83agx80 cbu4d94t ew0dbk1b irj2b8pg" style="display: flex; flex-direction: column; font-family: inherit; margin-bottom: -5px; margin-top: -5px;"><div class="qzhwtbm6 knvmm38d" style="font-family: inherit; margin-bottom: 5px; margin-top: 5px;"><span class="d2edcug0 hpfvmrgz qv66sw1b c1et5uql lr9zc1uh a8c37x1j fe6kdd0r mau55g9w c8b282yb keod5gw0 nxhoafnm aigsh9s9 d3f4x2em iv3no6db jq4qci2q a3bd9o3v b1v8xokw oo9gr5id hzawbc8m" dir="auto" style="color: var(--primary-text); display: block; font-family: inherit; line-height: 1.3333; max-width: 100%; min-width: 0px; overflow-wrap: break-word; word-break: break-word;"><div class="kvgmc6g5 cxmmr5t8 oygrvhab hcukyx3x c1et5uql ii04i59q" style="font-family: inherit; margin: 0px; overflow-wrap: break-word; white-space: pre-wrap;"><div dir="auto" style="font-family: inherit; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: large;">If you want something you believe you can't have, question the belief instead of the desire. Then see what happens.</span></div><div dir="auto" style="font-family: inherit; font-size: 0.9375rem;"><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEhtCZQasAB1spZpX3RmOwBpXBldvJtnGcV2ak_2fCAghLp2m4fRpfOaLsu9P8JwT1uto9Ecn931ctbqIjNcVXO-mrGZ0htbqc1XMj_42UaZX9ki_vKZkZfeuQbM9j5xAMpSkqMBfzuYOokAH9GYhxoMKlr7erJfuxGCtialp_uZt3UarGQ9CHdvsqqlhg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="401" data-original-width="612" height="301" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEhtCZQasAB1spZpX3RmOwBpXBldvJtnGcV2ak_2fCAghLp2m4fRpfOaLsu9P8JwT1uto9Ecn931ctbqIjNcVXO-mrGZ0htbqc1XMj_42UaZX9ki_vKZkZfeuQbM9j5xAMpSkqMBfzuYOokAH9GYhxoMKlr7erJfuxGCtialp_uZt3UarGQ9CHdvsqqlhg=w459-h301" width="459" /></a></div><br /></div></div></span></div></div></div></div></div>Mandy Evanshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07873828245677538118noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5455447371130959308.post-13851444961842991892022-01-29T07:45:00.002-08:002022-02-02T11:52:52.995-08:00Breakout Interview with Joe Vitale<p>New on YouTube! In this interview we aim to open some doors you may not know you closed. What's on the other side? Watch an see. </p><p><a class="oajrlxb2 g5ia77u1 qu0x051f esr5mh6w e9989ue4 r7d6kgcz rq0escxv nhd2j8a9 nc684nl6 p7hjln8o kvgmc6g5 cxmmr5t8 oygrvhab hcukyx3x jb3vyjys rz4wbd8a qt6c0cv9 a8nywdso i1ao9s8h esuyzwwr f1sip0of lzcic4wl gpro0wi8 py34i1dx" href="https://youtu.be/MTo-Q8EkYpA?fbclid=IwAR288PuzSXDFJRt7-ba0YM312SribzKqkJH1vu_6xQIxMuEXAZ9K4gHU0k8" original_target="https://youtu.be/mto-q8ekypa?fbclid=iwar288puzsxdfjrt7-ba0ym312sribzkqkjh1vu_6xqixmuexaz9k4ghu0k8" rel="nofollow noopener" role="link" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; border-color: initial; border-style: initial; border-width: 0px; box-sizing: border-box; cursor: pointer; display: inline-block; font-family: inherit; font-size: 0.9375rem; list-style: none; margin: 0px; outline: none; padding: 0px; text-align: inherit; text-decoration-line: none; touch-action: manipulation; white-space: pre-wrap;" tabindex="0" target="_blank" waprocessedanchor="true" waprocessedid="rp3h7v">https://youtu.be/MTo-Q8EkYpA</a></p><div dir="auto" style="background-color: white; color: #1c1e21; font-family: "Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12px;"><div class="ecm0bbzt hv4rvrfc ihqw7lf3 dati1w0a" data-ad-comet-preview="message" data-ad-preview="message" id="jsc_c_au" style="font-family: inherit; padding: 4px 16px 16px;"><div class="j83agx80 cbu4d94t ew0dbk1b irj2b8pg" style="display: flex; flex-direction: column; font-family: inherit; margin-bottom: -5px; margin-top: -5px;"><div class="qzhwtbm6 knvmm38d" style="font-family: inherit; margin-bottom: 5px; margin-top: 5px;"><span class="d2edcug0 hpfvmrgz qv66sw1b c1et5uql lr9zc1uh a8c37x1j fe6kdd0r mau55g9w c8b282yb keod5gw0 nxhoafnm aigsh9s9 d3f4x2em iv3no6db jq4qci2q a3bd9o3v b1v8xokw oo9gr5id hzawbc8m" color="var(--primary-text)" dir="auto" style="display: block; font-family: inherit; font-size: 0.9375rem; line-height: 1.3333; max-width: 100%; min-width: 0px; overflow-wrap: break-word; word-break: break-word;"><div class="kvgmc6g5 cxmmr5t8 oygrvhab hcukyx3x c1et5uql ii04i59q" style="font-family: inherit; margin: 0px; overflow-wrap: break-word; white-space: pre-wrap;"><div dir="auto" style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><div mcafee_wa_ann="{"rep":6,"cat":[147,179],"ufg":2,"url":"https://youtu.be/mto-q8ekypa?fbclid=iwar288puzsxdfjrt7-ba0ym312sribzkqkjh1vu_6xqixmuexaz9k4ghu0k8","dossierUrl":"https://youtu.be/mto-q8ekypa?fbclid=iwar288puzsxdfjrt7-ba0ym312sribzkqkjh1vu_6xqixmuexaz9k4ghu0k8"}" style="cursor: default; display: inline-block; float: none; font-family: inherit; padding: 0px 0px 0px 4px; position: relative; top: 2px; z-index: 1;" waprocessedid="rp3h7v"><div class="mcafee_ok" id="0DE9E47C-871A-4F90-8440-B190C216800A_2" style="background-image: url("chrome-extension://fheoggkfdfchfphceeifdbepaooicaho/images/annotation/green_icon.svg"); background-position: 50% 50%; background-repeat: no-repeat; background-size: contain; font-family: inherit; height: 16px; width: 16px;"></div></div></span></div><div dir="auto" style="font-family: inherit;">It's up on YouTube. Let's break out from some limits!</div></div></span></div></div></div></div><div class="l9j0dhe7" id="jsc_c_av" style="background-color: white; color: #1c1e21; font-family: "Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; position: relative;"><div class="l9j0dhe7" style="font-family: inherit; position: relative;"><div style="font-family: inherit;"><div class="b3i9ofy5 l9j0dhe7" style="background-color: var(--comment-background); font-family: inherit; position: relative;"><div class="j83agx80 soycq5t1 ni8dbmo4 stjgntxs l9j0dhe7" style="display: flex; font-family: inherit; line-height: 0; overflow: hidden; position: relative;"><a class="oajrlxb2 g5ia77u1 qu0x051f esr5mh6w e9989ue4 r7d6kgcz rq0escxv nhd2j8a9 nc684nl6 p7hjln8o kvgmc6g5 cxmmr5t8 oygrvhab hcukyx3x jb3vyjys rz4wbd8a qt6c0cv9 a8nywdso i1ao9s8h esuyzwwr f1sip0of lzcic4wl gmql0nx0 gpro0wi8 datstx6m k4urcfbm" href="https://youtu.be/MTo-Q8EkYpA?fbclid=IwAR1G_gUdVZziKGAUh78GnxFiWzdnFIARguq2oAgc2P9FTB487TdpKlF6z98" rel="nofollow noopener" role="link" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; 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font-weight: 600; line-height: 1.1765; max-width: 100%; min-width: 0px; overflow-wrap: break-word; word-break: break-word;"><span class="a8c37x1j ni8dbmo4 stjgntxs l9j0dhe7 ojkyduve" style="-webkit-box-orient: vertical; -webkit-line-clamp: 2; display: -webkit-box; font-family: inherit; overflow: hidden; padding-bottom: 1px; position: relative;"><span dir="auto" style="font-family: inherit;">Zero Limits Living Ep. 8: Special Guest Mandy Evans</span></span></span></div></div></div></div></div></div></a></div></div></div>Mandy Evanshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07873828245677538118noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5455447371130959308.post-38141801501289080132021-01-20T19:26:00.003-08:002021-01-20T19:28:08.871-08:00Inauguration 2021<p><span style="background-color: white; color: #0f1419; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18px; white-space: pre-wrap;">Inauguration thoughts:
How fragile and strong we are
A time to mourn and to rejoice
Relief and hope
Beauty, tradition, razor wire, and masks
Blessings and healing
Gratitude</span></p>Mandy Evanshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07873828245677538118noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5455447371130959308.post-65534709801129563502019-12-30T13:00:00.000-08:002019-12-30T13:00:00.942-08:00Down with Resolutions; Up with Flying Pigs!Do you make New Year's resolutions? Do you keep them?<br />
<br />
I switched to making a list of what I would love to have happen in the new year. Since a brand new decade begins on January 1, 2020 it seems especially apt to pay some attention to what we want to welcome in with it.<br />
<br />
Try this; write <b>I Welcome in 2020</b> at the top of your page. Then write down all of the things and experiences you would like to have come into your life.<br />
<div style="text-align: center;">
<b>Some pointers</b></div>
<ul>
<li>Don't be shy, no need to be reasonable</li>
<li>Do not bother about how it can happen</li>
<li>Be ready to accept miracles, outrageous, improbable outcomes like when pigs fly!</li>
</ul>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjAUijIMlvWzETFfqeUrIRqCZWY382WRsmc6Q7hVY9uJ_JfBwuJYY6g2xIw5LXnzdG5a4qSq10B2L1GrFWbPkhNkc2prMZ1TwUZbnUzAzkOppkK9W8k8NVbQvNoqMFd1ixZH34NlhGlCjh-/s1600/pigsfly-1024x601.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="601" data-original-width="1024" height="187" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjAUijIMlvWzETFfqeUrIRqCZWY382WRsmc6Q7hVY9uJ_JfBwuJYY6g2xIw5LXnzdG5a4qSq10B2L1GrFWbPkhNkc2prMZ1TwUZbnUzAzkOppkK9W8k8NVbQvNoqMFd1ixZH34NlhGlCjh-/s320/pigsfly-1024x601.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
Is there something you struggle with? This is an excellent time to compare how much time and energy you spend on what you <i>want</i> to happen versus how much you devote to what do <i>not want </i>to happen. That includes things that have already happened you are still upset about. Time to change the balance?<br />
<br />
Though I thought I knew better, I recently shocked myself when I saw how much energy I expended about having asthma. I wondered what to do, was ticked off every time I wheezed. I devoted a good part of every day to worrying and dreading. I lost touch with my desire to breathe freely. I forgot that these things come and go and that I want this one to go! Now I spend a few moments in the morning and at night (and whenever I catch myself focused on what I don't want) just plain wanting healthy breathing. I know it's possible. I see no reason to believe it cannot happen. Then I usually feel excited. I don't know what will happen but I'm sure to improve my chances.<br />
<br />
I'd love to know what you want this year. If you share you list with us, it will inspire others.<br />
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: large;">Happy New Year! Many Blessings!</span></div>
Mandy Evanshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07873828245677538118noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5455447371130959308.post-61013674686497695322019-12-24T11:08:00.000-08:002019-12-24T11:08:35.148-08:00Happy Holidays and Peace on EarthHappy Holidays! Whichever ones you celebrate, wishing love, joy, warmth, food and shelter for everyone. <br />
<h4 style="text-align: center;">
Peace on Earth!</h4>
<img alt="Let There Be Peace on Earth: Grassroot Movement?" src="https://innerself.com/content/images/2017/540/09-16-peace-on-earth.jpg" /><br />
<br />
Love,<br />
MandyMandy Evanshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07873828245677538118noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5455447371130959308.post-40965322305652714282019-12-21T10:02:00.000-08:002019-12-21T10:02:41.544-08:00Happy Winter SolsticeDear Ones,<br />
Rest up on this long dark night for wonders to come.<br />
<br />
<img alt="Image may contain: water" src="https://scontent-lax3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/80209405_10158000666409835_3764029885614391296_n.jpg?_nc_cat=102&_nc_oc=AQnWvUynTB1lP1fvsEqx0I7gN0rDU61nvhKclT5fzaFGzBffSb_4bSNUBwgLFbbC6Nm-CZA4N2mLXZm9ksKfYyIX&_nc_ht=scontent-lax3-1.xx&oh=69c87fc01729e672be2b8dcb8fb7b758&oe=5EA79596" /><br />
Love,<br />
Mandy<br />
<br />
PS, Less than wonderful, my website is down. Working on a solution.Mandy Evanshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07873828245677538118noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5455447371130959308.post-11988373548990995412019-04-03T12:46:00.000-07:002019-04-03T12:49:07.147-07:00Teenage Blog Reviews "Emotional Options"Hawi is 13. She reviews books on her blog, MAGICAL BOOK WORLD <a href="http://magicalbookworld.com/">http://magicalbookworld.com/</a>. I am excited to know that her review of "Emotional Options" may help teenagers learn how to be happier <i>before</i> they load up with years of painful emotional baggage to sort through.<br />
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Here is Hawi's review, reprinted with her permission. </div>
<div>
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<header class="entry-header " style="background-color: white; color: #404040; font-family: "Source Sans Pro", Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 20px; margin-left: 146px; position: relative; z-index: 1;"><h1 class="entry-title" style="border: 0px; clear: both; color: #333333; font-family: Oswald, sans-serif; font-size: 2.4rem; font-style: inherit; font-weight: 300; letter-spacing: 2px; line-height: 1.7; margin: 0px 0px 1em; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-transform: uppercase; vertical-align: baseline;">
BOOK REVIEW- EMOTIONAL OPTIONS</h1>
</header><br />
<div class="entry-body" style="background-color: white; border: 0px; color: #404040; font-family: "Source Sans Pro", Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 20px; margin: 1.5em 0px 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px 0px 0px 146px; vertical-align: baseline;">
<div class="entry-meta" style="border: 0px; font-family: "Droid Serif", Georgia, serif; font-size: 1.2rem; font-style: italic; font-weight: inherit; left: 0px; line-height: 2; margin: 0px 0px 1em; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; position: absolute; text-align: right; vertical-align: baseline; width: 111px;">
<span class="date" style="border: 0px; display: block; font-family: inherit; font-size: 15px; font-style: inherit; font-weight: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><a href="http://magicalbookworld.com/2019/03/19/book-review-emotional-options/" rel="bookmark" style="border: 0px; color: #aaaaaa; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; font-weight: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration-line: none; vertical-align: baseline;" title="Permalink to Book Review- Emotional Options">19th March 2019</a></span></div>
<div class="entry-content" style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; font-weight: inherit; margin: 0px 0px 3em; min-height: 4em; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">
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I will forward this by saying that although this is very different to the books that I usually blog about, I do not hesitate in including this to the selection. I am a believer that emotional wellbeing is an important part of most people’s lives, and therefore it is almost my duty as a human being to aid other people in the mission to achieve happiness.</div>
<div style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; font-weight: inherit; margin-bottom: 1.5em; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">
This book is a very important book and deserves a place on every bookshelf. I finished it in one brief yet enlightening sitting and am left with a slightly different outlook on being happy. Mandy Evans has succeeded in crafting a ‘handbook for happiness’ and guides the reader to that stage with easily-understandable words of wisdom. I was pleasantly surprised by the content of this book, and I am sure to reach for it at many trying periods during my life.</div>
<div style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; font-weight: inherit; margin-bottom: 1.5em; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">
Thank you Mandy!</div>
<div style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; font-weight: inherit; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">
-Hawi</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
Mandy Evanshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07873828245677538118noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5455447371130959308.post-80912589195497942262019-04-01T12:27:00.000-07:002019-04-01T12:27:46.042-07:00The Mightiest MotivatorDefying the laws of gravity, they rise up to reach beyond everything they have ever known. Over and over they fall. They rise up again. Eventually they conquer a brave new world.<br />
<div style="background: transparent; border: 0px; margin-bottom: 24px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">
They set no goals. They require no discipline, adhere to no schedule. Fear of failure, regret, guilt for not practicing enough-these strategies play no part in their game plan or ultimate success.</div>
<div style="background: transparent; border: 0px; margin-bottom: 24px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">
They are babies. Using the strongest motivation known to human kind, they master the art of walking. How? Why? With what motivation? The answer to all 3 questions is the same. Desire-because they want to.</div>
<div style="background: transparent; border: 0px; margin-bottom: 24px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">
You want a master class in motivation? Watch babies. Every day they achieve something that was impossible the day before.</div>
<div style="background: transparent; border: 0px; margin-bottom: 24px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">
Yet all day every day intelligent, well educated people use everything but their natural desire to lead them to what they want. They use misery motivators instead. They withhold happiness from themselves, promising they will never feel good until they get that car or that job, or that first million dollars. They use guilt, regret, shame, anger, punishment, worry, fear and self-loathing to bash, beat and prod themselves and other people through life. Why? In order to achieve goals they hope will make them happy.</div>
<div style="background: transparent; border: 0px; margin-bottom: 24px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">
Misery motivators achieve miserable results. If that’s not self-defeating, please tell me what is?</div>
<div style="background: transparent; border: 0px; margin-bottom: 24px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">
Add some might and joy to your motivation. Visit <a href="https://mandyevans.com/">https://mandyevans.com</a> for courses, free belief quizzes and the free article “A Kinder from of Motivation” by Jeffrey Pease.</div>
<div style="background: transparent; border: 0px; margin-bottom: 24px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">
Here is an excerpt about motivation from <i>Emotional Options: A Handbook for Happiness</i>. Use it to motivate yourself like a big baby.</div>
<div style="background: transparent; border: 0px; margin-bottom: 24px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">
“We can divide the ways to motivate yourself and others into two basic categories:</div>
<div style="background: transparent; border: 0px; margin-bottom: 24px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">
<b>Desire and Happiness</b> or <b>Need and Unhappiness</b> Motivation with desire and happiness moves things about so quickly that you may not notice it happening.</div>
<div style="background: transparent; border: 0px; margin-bottom: 24px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">
When we use desire for our motivation, the difference between wanting and attachment becomes clear. Wanting is moving toward and can include happiness. Attachment is often static and requires the feelings of need and sometimes fear, for our very survival. Attachment appears to connect us to the object of our need-as if our fear, our sorrow, our guilt, our experience of need, will bring it to us or keep it escaping. But this does not work very well.</div>
<div style="background: transparent; border: 0px; margin-bottom: 24px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">
To believe that you need something requires, by definition, that you also believe that you cannot be okay without that something. It may be an experience that you believe you need to have or a material object or goal to achieve.</div>
<div style="background: transparent; border: 0px; margin-bottom: 24px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">
In this need filled view of reality, if you do not get what you want or reach your goal, that very not getting threatens your well-being, your hopes for happiness, and your ability to be okay. When you use need and unhappiness in order to help yourself to get what you want, you live in that need and un-happiness. That experience is life extinguishing. The very thing you do to help yourself cripples you. It chokes your life force and creativity.</div>
<div style="background: transparent; border: 0px; margin-bottom: 24px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">
In contrast, the experience of happiness and desire is life enhancing. It allows happiness now. It fosters a sense of being okay and feeling good. It simply acknowledges that something more or something different would be welcome.</div>
<div style="background: transparent; border: 0px; margin-bottom: 24px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">
Years ago, I visited a garden with a statue of a particularly jolly Buddha. Inscribed beneath it were the words, “Misunderstood desire is the cause of all suffering.” <i>Misunderstood</i> desire. At last it made sense!</div>
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We have all heard the familiar quote, “Desire is the cause of all suffering.” I had often wondered how someone as wise as Buddha could have thought that. How could desire ever cause suffering? Attachment and “misunderstood desire” do that. Perhaps some Puritan ethics got mixed up with Buddha’s wisdom.</div>
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Wanting something, coupled with the belief that you cannot have it, or that you are foolish to want it, can cause some powerful suffering. But not desire alone. Desire, imagination, creation, anticipation-that stuff is all fun.</div>
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Desire functions as an inner sense of direction. It may be all we will ever need to know to guide us through life -- to learn all that we need to know, to show up where we need to be. At least I cannot think of a more reliable guide. What else is there-someone else’s desire? Somebody else’s idea about what you should do? Your desire, your awareness of what you welcome offers the best compass for finding your way through the mystery of life that I have found so far. This system of navigation pretty much eliminates regret and guilt. It also banishes the temptation to try to make anyone else suffer.</div>
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When you follow your conscious desire as an inner sense of direction, correcting your course as you go, all you have to do when you want a change is ask yourself, “What do I welcome now? Where shall I go from here?”</div>
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You can skip that part about feeling bad, worrying that you will never change, blaming someone else for your predicament. You can bypass the frantic search for a new game plan before you even know what game you want to play.”</div>
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From <i>Emotional Options</i> by Mandy Evans. Available as e-book and paperback <a href="http://amzn.com/B008RBUC4S">http://amzn.com/B008RBUC4S</a></div>
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As my friend success coach, Michael Neill says in his happily helpful book, <i>You Can Have What You Want</i> "Happiness Leads to Success more often that success leads to happiness."</div>
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Wishing you mighty motivation, love, happiness and many blessings.</div>
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Love,<br />
Mandy</div>
Mandy Evanshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07873828245677538118noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5455447371130959308.post-72559783526760301802018-10-13T15:22:00.000-07:002018-10-13T15:24:30.367-07:00You Are Like a DiamondYou are like a diamond, beyond rare, one of a kind. You? Yes you, with everything you have and everything you have not.<br />
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You could look at a diamond and say, but it's so hard to cut. And there is no ruby or emerald in it. It's so hard to find. Somehow diamonds escape that kind of criticism.<br />
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What if you break out from it too? Why not? Why not stand in awe of the beautiful, unique, beyond rare being that you are? Shine on.Mandy Evanshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07873828245677538118noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5455447371130959308.post-31431143082380046862018-10-04T10:45:00.000-07:002019-01-23T09:15:59.316-08:007 Questions to Recover from Sexual Assault<div>
Each woman or man who reveals secrets from the past that have haunted them for decades rings a bell to liberate others. This bell cannot be unwrung. The "Me Too" movement surged to a tidal wave that washed away the conviction that people in power had the right to sexual subjugation over the less-than-powerful. The belief that there was nothing anyone could do about it changed quickly--as any belief can. Calls to the National Sexual Assault Line at 1-800-656-4673 (HOPE) surged.<br />
Do you know someone who survived a sexual attack or even a rape and still suffers from the experience? That someone may even be you.</div>
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Here are 7 keys to unlock the door and escape from the prison that still holds you captive, that blocks happiness and success. These are questions for you to ask yourself. There are no right and wrong answers, only <i>your</i> answers. No one else knows them. Write freely. If an answer does not make sense to you just stay with the question as more insight comes to you. If strong emotions come up, see if you can keep going. </div>
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I learned how these questions work from people I coached as individuals, in ongoing groups, workshops and in response to my book <i>Travelling Free: How to Recover from the Past by Changing Your Beliefs</i>. I discovered that each person who survived a painful experience did so in a different way with different lasting effects. Each person held unique keys to his or her own freedom.<br />
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T<span style="text-align: center;">he 7 questions that have helped people move beyond surviving to thriving</span></h4>
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<li>What happened that was hard for you?</li>
<li>What was hard about it?</li>
<li>What did it mean to you about yourself and your life?</li>
<li>Regarding your answer, do you believe that?</li>
<li>If you believe that, what about it seems true?</li>
<li>What are you concerned would happen if you did not believe that?</li>
<li>If you could feel any way in the world, even though that happened to you, how would you like to feel?</li>
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I would love to learn about your experience with these questions.<br />
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Cheering you on to freedom, happiness and success!</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhgmZ5doudiWC_WSyGv2yGR-L7loEDNlDxpzdZparIph9bkmeLKDwib5DCrOc0vtGUVYoNrVjOvA6rhn_fpgntI6eGzd0kADwRBCoJ53GJ_FAzQAs2wUF1bmoiQFgOnRM1HqJEfQitZIagC/s1600/image002+TF+Kindle+Cover.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="959" data-original-width="678" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhgmZ5doudiWC_WSyGv2yGR-L7loEDNlDxpzdZparIph9bkmeLKDwib5DCrOc0vtGUVYoNrVjOvA6rhn_fpgntI6eGzd0kADwRBCoJ53GJ_FAzQAs2wUF1bmoiQFgOnRM1HqJEfQitZIagC/s200/image002+TF+Kindle+Cover.jpg" width="141" /></a></div>
Resource: <i>Travelling Free How to Recover from the Past by Changing Your Beliefs</i> is a workshop-in-a-book to breakout from lasting effects of painful experiences. It is available at Amazon worldwide in print or e-book editions. Read more <a href="http://amzn.com/B002ACPNXK">http://amzn.com/B002ACPNXK</a><br />
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Mandy Evanshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07873828245677538118noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5455447371130959308.post-86496953598837418542018-04-04T18:29:00.000-07:002018-04-04T18:36:17.101-07:00Thank You Dr. Martin Luther KingThank you Martin Luther King. On April 3rd, 1968, my then husband Ron, took me to see Janis Joplin at a new supper club in the Village in NYC, Generation, for my birthday. The owner, Barry Imhoff, had managed the Cafe Au Go Go where I had worked and Ron still did. Barry went way out on a financial limb to get Janis for the opening weekend. It was my first night out after my son Barnaby Dorfman was born, the first time I left him with a sitter. I confess, I was so exhausted I barely made it through the evening.<br />
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The next day, Martin Luther King was killed. Our Upper West Side Neighborhood erupted in gun fire. Out neighborhood store at 97th and Broadway was looted. The Vietnam War raged on and on and Barry Imhoff lost the club he'd dreamed of for many years.<br />
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I wondered what kind of a world I had brought my son into. The war ended. Life went on and Barack Obama gave me reason to rejoice. I thought it was over -- the decades, even centuries of racism, cruelty and hatred of people slightly different from each other.<br />
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Now I struggle again, with the Muslim Ban, the hunting down of my neighbors from Mexico, El Salvador and Guatemala and a man in office who calls other people's countries S---holes". Thank you Martin Luther King for your courage and vision. Thank you for teaching me that it is better to keep my "eyes on the prize" than to give in to despair or anger. I try to keep that focus and do what I can to promote peace, kindness and equality for all beings. I am grateful for your example and to everyone who follows it.Mandy Evanshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07873828245677538118noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5455447371130959308.post-3491576451580539552018-02-14T12:21:00.003-08:002018-02-14T12:26:13.662-08:00Valentine Lesson from a Crane<div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="ssr" data-offset-key="8b7lo-0-0" style="background-color: white; color: #1d2129; white-space: pre-wrap;"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="8b7lo-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="8b7lo-0-0"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;">The windows on our patio sliders reflect when the sun shines on them. I don't suppose cranes knows that. Our crane spent the morning going from one door to another, peering at himself, flapping his wings, waiting, peering, flapping, waiting. walking round appearing agitated, approaching another patio door, peering, flapping, waiting. Does he feel rejected? Does he know it's him? <br />
<div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="ssr" data-offset-key="20tup-0-0" style="background-color: white; color: #1d2129; white-space: pre-wrap;"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span data-offset-key="8b7lo-0-0"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhKOoJ1YAe1QMkmkLbrM-SVAIWVT8kNEU5c2aRyFJoQSc7bS4qMeX_0KmdE_Vx8stD3DyexkwHkF3OscC4iQ5KOfYhgjpfKrJnsVkch0QqKLjbFZBJGYd0054aET_6fKuPuy1mfCxdUOAXT/s1600/Heron+or+Crane.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1067" data-original-width="1600" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhKOoJ1YAe1QMkmkLbrM-SVAIWVT8kNEU5c2aRyFJoQSc7bS4qMeX_0KmdE_Vx8stD3DyexkwHkF3OscC4iQ5KOfYhgjpfKrJnsVkch0QqKLjbFZBJGYd0054aET_6fKuPuy1mfCxdUOAXT/s320/Heron+or+Crane.JPG" width="320" /></a></span></span></div><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="20tup-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="8b7lo-0-0"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;">How many of us peer at ourselves without recognising our magnificence and move on -- rejecting the very self that longs for love?<br />
<div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="ssr" data-offset-key="6vund-0-0" style="background-color: white; color: #1d2129; white-space: pre-wrap;"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="6vund-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative; text-align: center;"><span data-offset-key="8b7lo-0-0"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;">Sending love to your magnificent self!</span></span></span></span></div></div></div></div></div></div>Mandy Evanshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07873828245677538118noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5455447371130959308.post-64748125590754059512017-12-03T15:27:00.000-08:002019-12-20T22:29:36.132-08:00The Blessing BonusOh, if holidays would only come with peace on earth, good will to men -- women and children, all living creatures! But no, life goes on with it's full mix of gain and loss, birth and death, no matter what the season.<br />
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During one challenging time, I began to send blessings to everyone I could think of. I started with near and dear, moved on to dead and dear, then out everyone who has touched my life, then on to people I'm not so fond of.<br />
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It left me keenly aware of the many people I<i> </i>have been blessed to know and how deeply you and they have enriched my life. Sort of a blessing bonus. I recommend it, especially for holidays when it's easy to miss loved ones we've lost, or feel left out, or have to spend time with someone we don't get along with so well. Give it a whirl, just send out blessings and see what happens.<br />
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I wonder what our beautiful world would be like if we all sent each other, friend and foe, blessings from time to time.<br />
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Sending many blessings to you and yours for happy holidays filled with love.<br />
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Mandy<br />
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<br />Mandy Evanshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07873828245677538118noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5455447371130959308.post-45041088279731287262016-12-30T09:53:00.000-08:002016-12-30T09:56:07.675-08:00Improbable Wonders Stronger than a resolution, much more fun that setting goals! Make a list of what you would like to welcome onto your life in the coming New Year.<br />
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Write the title "I Welcome." Let your imagination soar and see what happens.<br />
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Sharing all or part (if there's stuff you want to keep private) of your list gives it a boost and inspires others. I'm doing mine on New Year's Eve and will share it here. I'd love to see yours. Just click "comments" below and we can all share your visions<br />
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Oh, and do not be reasonable. No need for that!<br />
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<img alt="Image result for flying pigs pics" height="212" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/originals/74/dc/9c/74dc9cb270c1cffe00c990fa6624484b.jpg" width="320" /><br />
Cheering you on to improbable wonders!<br />
Love,<br />
MandyMandy Evanshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07873828245677538118noreply@blogger.com4