Saturday, October 13, 2018

You Are Like a Diamond

You are like a diamond, beyond rare, one of a kind. You? Yes you, with everything you have and everything you have not.

You could look at a diamond and say, but it's so hard to cut. And there is no ruby or emerald in it. It's so hard to find. Somehow diamonds escape that kind of criticism.

What if you break out from it too? Why not? Why not stand in awe of the beautiful, unique, beyond rare being that you are? Shine on.

Thursday, October 4, 2018

7 Questions to Recover from Sexual Assault

     Each woman or man who reveals secrets from the past that have haunted them for decades rings a bell to liberate others. This bell cannot be unwrung. The "Me Too" movement surged to a tidal wave that washed away the conviction that people in power had the right to sexual subjugation over the less-than-powerful. The belief that there was nothing anyone could do about it changed quickly--as any belief can. Calls to the National Sexual Assault Line at 1-800-656-4673 (HOPE) surged.
          Do you know someone who survived a sexual attack or even a rape and still suffers from the experience? That someone may even be you.
     Here are 7 keys to unlock the door and escape from the prison that still holds you captive, that blocks happiness and success. These are questions for you to ask yourself. There are no right and wrong answers, only your answers. No one else knows them. Write freely. If an answer does not make sense to you just stay with the question as more insight comes to you. If strong emotions come up, see if you can keep going. 
     I learned how these questions work from people I coached as individuals, in ongoing groups, workshops and in response to my book Travelling Free: How to Recover from the Past by Changing Your Beliefs. I discovered that each person who survived a painful experience did so in a different way with different lasting effects. Each person held unique keys to his or her own freedom.

  The 7 questions that have helped people move beyond surviving to thriving

  1. What happened that was hard for you?
  2. What was hard about it?
  3. What did it mean to you about yourself and your life?
  4. Regarding your answer, do you believe that?
  5. If you believe that, what about it seems true?
  6. What are you concerned would happen if you did not believe that?
  7. If you could feel any way in the world, even though that happened to you, how would you like to feel?
I would love to learn about your experience with these questions.

Cheering you on to freedom, happiness and success!

 Resource: Travelling Free How to Recover from the Past by Changing Your Beliefs is a workshop-in-a-book to breakout from lasting effects of painful experiences. It is available at Amazon worldwide in print or e-book editions. Read more

Wednesday, April 4, 2018

Thank You Dr. Martin Luther King

Thank you Martin Luther King. On April 3rd, 1968, my then husband Ron, took me to see Janis Joplin at a new supper club in the Village in NYC, Generation, for my birthday. The owner, Barry Imhoff, had managed the Cafe Au Go Go where I had worked and Ron still did. Barry went way out on a financial limb to get Janis for the opening weekend. It was my first night out after my son Barnaby Dorfman was born, the first time I left him with a sitter. I confess, I was so exhausted I barely made it through the evening.

The next day, Martin Luther King was killed. Our Upper West Side Neighborhood erupted in gun fire. Out neighborhood store at 97th and Broadway was looted. The Vietnam War raged on and on and Barry Imhoff lost the club he'd dreamed of for many years.

I wondered what kind of a world I had brought my son into. The war ended. Life went on and Barack Obama gave me reason to rejoice. I thought it was over -- the decades, even centuries of racism, cruelty and hatred of people slightly different from each other.

Now I struggle again, with the Muslim Ban, the hunting down of my neighbors from Mexico, El Salvador and Guatemala and a man in office who calls other people's countries S---holes". Thank you Martin Luther King for your courage and vision. Thank you for teaching me that it is better to keep my "eyes on the prize" than to give in to despair or anger. I try to keep that focus and do what I can to promote peace, kindness and equality for all beings. I am grateful for your example and to everyone who follows it.

Wednesday, February 14, 2018

Valentine Lesson from a Crane

The windows on our patio sliders reflect when the sun shines on them. I don't suppose cranes knows that. Our crane spent the morning going from one door to another, peering at himself, flapping his wings, waiting, peering, flapping, waiting. walking round appearing agitated, approaching another patio door, peering, flapping, waiting. Does he feel rejected? Does he know it's him?
How many of us peer at ourselves without recognising our magnificence and move on -- rejecting the very self that longs for love?
Sending love to your magnificent self!