What do you find challenging in relationships -- not just romantic ones, but all kinds, like friendships and people you work with?
For me the hardest one is the choice to say something to someone knowing full well they won't like it and may find it painful, or be a total hypocrite. Usually I can just let it go. I'm not the boss of the universe or anyone but my dear cleaning lady for 3 hours every other week. But sometimes, if you do not speak up you will have to relinquish something you value deeply or put up with something destructive. Give up or risk the lash-back scenario, the loss of a relationship, or having someone set out to destroy your reputation? It is not so easy.
We all face those choices. How do you deal with them?
I've opted to say my piece as kindly as I could in a couple of instances when the choice seemed like doing that or taking a long drink of slow working poison. It was hard, really hard -- the consequences long and drawn out. The result in self-respect and closer connections are worth it.
Connecting with our fellow-beings presents such possibilities for joy and pain. At the first (and probably last) Breakout Coach Training last week, we amazed ourselves with the complexity and power of the barriers we have built between us and our fellow beings. We broke out from many of our privately run prisons of isolation to an outpouring of love and creativity.
What is a relationship challenge for you? How do you deal with it?
Connecting with love,
Mandy
Friday, November 4, 2011
Tuesday, November 1, 2011
Are You Rich Or Poor? How to Tell
Do you believe you are rich or poor? If you have enough and some to spare you are rich. If you do not have enough and have nothing to spare, you are poor.
One of the keys that will prop open the door to prosperity is the knowledge that you always have something to give. It may as sweet as a smile or as rare as understanding and acceptance. The generosity of encouragement has strong power to uplift or hold someone up who is about to fall over. A hand to hold can provide a lifeline. Perhaps you can provide actual help with a task or trouble? It could be money too, of course.
I have seen people blast out of poverty consciousness by daring to donate some of their store of cash to a worthy cause, or by leaving a tip to brighten someone's day.
A friend who barely had enough income to scrape by, pledged to give $10 a month to an organization dedicated to ending world hunger at an event we attended. When I whispered, "You don't have to do that." "She replied, "I can do that. I know what it is like not to be able to feed your children. I can do that."
Coincidence, or prime-the-pump Karma? She got a job soon after. It paid enough to move the specter of all-out-of-money farther away than it had ever been in her life.
On the flip side, I live in a fairly affluent community filled with many generous and kind people – and a few who look as if they believe if they smile, they will lose something they can never get back. A poster pops up on Facebook lately. It says, "Some people are so poor all they have is money." I know a few of those people too. The suffer just like those who struggle to pay the rent.
Are you rich or poor? What do you believe? I'd love to know.
Love,
Mandy
For more resources visit: http://mandyevans.com/the-breakout-store/
One of the keys that will prop open the door to prosperity is the knowledge that you always have something to give. It may as sweet as a smile or as rare as understanding and acceptance. The generosity of encouragement has strong power to uplift or hold someone up who is about to fall over. A hand to hold can provide a lifeline. Perhaps you can provide actual help with a task or trouble? It could be money too, of course.
I have seen people blast out of poverty consciousness by daring to donate some of their store of cash to a worthy cause, or by leaving a tip to brighten someone's day.
A friend who barely had enough income to scrape by, pledged to give $10 a month to an organization dedicated to ending world hunger at an event we attended. When I whispered, "You don't have to do that." "She replied, "I can do that. I know what it is like not to be able to feed your children. I can do that."
Coincidence, or prime-the-pump Karma? She got a job soon after. It paid enough to move the specter of all-out-of-money farther away than it had ever been in her life.
On the flip side, I live in a fairly affluent community filled with many generous and kind people – and a few who look as if they believe if they smile, they will lose something they can never get back. A poster pops up on Facebook lately. It says, "Some people are so poor all they have is money." I know a few of those people too. The suffer just like those who struggle to pay the rent.
Are you rich or poor? What do you believe? I'd love to know.
Love,
Mandy
For more resources visit: http://mandyevans.com/the-breakout-store/
Monday, September 26, 2011
You're Probably Not Normal!
You're probably are not normal! One of a kind,
that's what you are. It does not get any more
special than that. How exquisitely unique, your
view of life and our world. Only you have touched
all of the people you have loved and befriended.
What amazing gifts you have to share. If you attempt
to trade them all for a spot on a bell curve marked
"normal," you will never know who you might connect
with if you give a hint of your splendor. Even if you
try to make that bad bargain, you probably won't
succeed; you'll just dim your light a little.
One of a kind character actor, Bill Hickey, was one
of the strangest people I ever knew -- tall, skinny with
teeth like a race horse and a NY accent so intense it
seemed like a joke. Nominated for an Academy
Award for a role in "Prizi's Honor" and beloved acting
teacher at the HB Studio in NYC, he once said,
"If you want a really good acting lesson just ride the
subway and watch all of the people trying to act normal."
Just to think of the beyond-normal wonder of
Bill Hickey and you! Still, almost everyone I know
lives with painful beliefs about lack of worthiness
and doubt about what they have to offer.
If I had a magic wand and could wave those beliefs
away,would you want me to wave it?
If not, why not? If you have an answer to that one,
you've got some beliefs that would be well worth
exploring.
How about celebrating an "I'm Not Normal Day"?
We won't have to tell anyone if we don't want to.
We could devote 24 hours to knowing deep in our
hearts, that each of us is a one of a kind treasure.
I'm starting now; I hope you will join me.
that's what you are. It does not get any more
special than that. How exquisitely unique, your
view of life and our world. Only you have touched
all of the people you have loved and befriended.
What amazing gifts you have to share. If you attempt
to trade them all for a spot on a bell curve marked
"normal," you will never know who you might connect
with if you give a hint of your splendor. Even if you
try to make that bad bargain, you probably won't
succeed; you'll just dim your light a little.
One of a kind character actor, Bill Hickey, was one
of the strangest people I ever knew -- tall, skinny with
teeth like a race horse and a NY accent so intense it
seemed like a joke. Nominated for an Academy
Award for a role in "Prizi's Honor" and beloved acting
teacher at the HB Studio in NYC, he once said,
"If you want a really good acting lesson just ride the
subway and watch all of the people trying to act normal."
Just to think of the beyond-normal wonder of
Bill Hickey and you! Still, almost everyone I know
lives with painful beliefs about lack of worthiness
and doubt about what they have to offer.
If I had a magic wand and could wave those beliefs
away,would you want me to wave it?
If not, why not? If you have an answer to that one,
you've got some beliefs that would be well worth
exploring.
How about celebrating an "I'm Not Normal Day"?
We won't have to tell anyone if we don't want to.
We could devote 24 hours to knowing deep in our
hearts, that each of us is a one of a kind treasure.
I'm starting now; I hope you will join me.
Saturday, September 10, 2011
9/11 Vision
On TV, the tear filled eyes of the children who lost a parent on 9/11 fill my heart with love and admiration for their courage. My thoughts turn to the countless children we humans have orphaned with our blind faith in punishment and vengeance.
I also hold in my heart a vision. In my vision, each person strives for peace, understanding, kindness, compassion and creative solutions to problems. We want it with the same intense desire many of us feel for money, cars, status or fame. I'm feeding the fire of that desire.
Smiling and sending love,
I also hold in my heart a vision. In my vision, each person strives for peace, understanding, kindness, compassion and creative solutions to problems. We want it with the same intense desire many of us feel for money, cars, status or fame. I'm feeding the fire of that desire.
Smiling and sending love,
Friday, September 2, 2011
Prosperity Is An Inside Job
Questions about money fly around like mosquitoes on a muggy night lately. No kidding? Since we hurtled from the ‘give me, get me, buy me era to the days of ‘what happened to my job? And who took my retirement?’ it’s a natural hot topic.
Here are some prosperity priming tips to weather the storm and thrive.
Six habits to breakout from:
1. Clinging to the status quo. Fighting change uses up energy you could put to better use. It’s like trying to cling to a rock as a tsunami roars in instead running for high ground. One of the toughest laws of the universe tells us, “you either expand, or you contract.” You can’t just hover; you’ll crash.
2. Blaming. The fixed idea that someone else determines the outcome of your life blocks creativity. It sucks the life force right out of you. The more you are will to be responsible for, the more freedom you have.
3. Resenting the success of others. It is very hard to attract to yourself what you condemn in others.
4. Complaining. A little whining goes a long way. It turns people off. Not only that, it keeps your focus on what you don’t want. What you focus on grows!
5. Fear. Many people actually keep themselves in a state of fear and anxiety on purpose due to the misguided belief that fear will help them avoid danger. Fear bombards their bodies with adrenalin and wears them out to the point of giving up.
6. Shame. The belief that there is something shameful about loss and hardship is prevalent. I’ve explored it with lots of people. It has never proved true.
Seven habits to cultivate:
1. Flexibility: You may have to move, downsize or expand. It can be a nightmare (if you do not break out from the habits above) or a great adventure. Your choice.
2. Gratitude. Being aware of the miracles around us natures our sense of wonder. Feeling grateful alters your private version of reality from one of lack to one of abundance and blessings.
3. Looking for opportunities. One of my favorite quotes is, “What you see is mostly what you look for.” Keep an eye out for open doors in places you might not expect to find them.
4. Asking for help. Often a simple shame-blame-and-complaint-free request brings big benefits. Friends, family and Facebook Friends are often glad to provide introductions, useful advice, leads and other assistance if they know what you are looking for.
5. Learning. A return to school, some training in your field, working with a coach, a how-to book, a master mind group, an exciting hour with Google – just for starts! So much to learn, so little time. Learning about how to improve your financial health is fun and profitable.
6. Desire. Use your desire as a sense of direction. Follow it and your intense curiosity.
7. Break out from Limiting Beliefs. When you develop the habit of challenging any belief that blocks happiness and success you move out of the prison of lack into the space of miracles.
Prosperity is an inside job. The greatest experience of prosperity comes with knowing you are enough and you have enough to give to others. It may be your love, your time, a job, encouragement, knowledge or money. Circulate your gifts wisely. They will grow and come back to you.
Additional Resources:
October BREAKOUT Coach Training in Palm Springs. If there is a way you can do it, be there! This is a once in a lifetime opportunity to learn how to break out from poverty and lack to abundance and the space of miracles. I have NO plans to offer it again. There are 8 spaces open. Does one have your name on it?
http://mandyevans.com/breakout-training
Check out 50 Beliefs About Money. Which ones are holding you back? It’s free.
http://mandyevans.com/archives/82
Cheering you on to happy prosperity!
Love,
Mandy
Here are some prosperity priming tips to weather the storm and thrive.
Six habits to breakout from:
1. Clinging to the status quo. Fighting change uses up energy you could put to better use. It’s like trying to cling to a rock as a tsunami roars in instead running for high ground. One of the toughest laws of the universe tells us, “you either expand, or you contract.” You can’t just hover; you’ll crash.
2. Blaming. The fixed idea that someone else determines the outcome of your life blocks creativity. It sucks the life force right out of you. The more you are will to be responsible for, the more freedom you have.
3. Resenting the success of others. It is very hard to attract to yourself what you condemn in others.
4. Complaining. A little whining goes a long way. It turns people off. Not only that, it keeps your focus on what you don’t want. What you focus on grows!
5. Fear. Many people actually keep themselves in a state of fear and anxiety on purpose due to the misguided belief that fear will help them avoid danger. Fear bombards their bodies with adrenalin and wears them out to the point of giving up.
6. Shame. The belief that there is something shameful about loss and hardship is prevalent. I’ve explored it with lots of people. It has never proved true.
Seven habits to cultivate:
1. Flexibility: You may have to move, downsize or expand. It can be a nightmare (if you do not break out from the habits above) or a great adventure. Your choice.
2. Gratitude. Being aware of the miracles around us natures our sense of wonder. Feeling grateful alters your private version of reality from one of lack to one of abundance and blessings.
3. Looking for opportunities. One of my favorite quotes is, “What you see is mostly what you look for.” Keep an eye out for open doors in places you might not expect to find them.
4. Asking for help. Often a simple shame-blame-and-complaint-free request brings big benefits. Friends, family and Facebook Friends are often glad to provide introductions, useful advice, leads and other assistance if they know what you are looking for.
5. Learning. A return to school, some training in your field, working with a coach, a how-to book, a master mind group, an exciting hour with Google – just for starts! So much to learn, so little time. Learning about how to improve your financial health is fun and profitable.
6. Desire. Use your desire as a sense of direction. Follow it and your intense curiosity.
7. Break out from Limiting Beliefs. When you develop the habit of challenging any belief that blocks happiness and success you move out of the prison of lack into the space of miracles.
Prosperity is an inside job. The greatest experience of prosperity comes with knowing you are enough and you have enough to give to others. It may be your love, your time, a job, encouragement, knowledge or money. Circulate your gifts wisely. They will grow and come back to you.
Additional Resources:
October BREAKOUT Coach Training in Palm Springs. If there is a way you can do it, be there! This is a once in a lifetime opportunity to learn how to break out from poverty and lack to abundance and the space of miracles. I have NO plans to offer it again. There are 8 spaces open. Does one have your name on it?
http://mandyevans.com/breakout-training
Check out 50 Beliefs About Money. Which ones are holding you back? It’s free.
http://mandyevans.com/archives/82
Cheering you on to happy prosperity!
Love,
Mandy
Wednesday, August 10, 2011
BREAKOUT to Miracles Radio Show
On Thursday, 8/11 from 12 -1:00 pm PDT Hay House radio will air "BREAKOUT to Miracles" with Michael Neill and me.
You know how sometimes you just sort of talk then wait your turn while someone else does? Then sometimes you have a conversation? You think new thoughts, learn new stuff, have a good laugh or two, share some useful information. The time flies by and you wish all of your friends could have been there.
This was one of those conversations and you can all listen in! Woo Hoo!
I'd love to know what you think so please leave comments.
Here's the link. Breakout to Miracles Radio Show
It will be archived so you can listen at your convenience in the next few days.
To many happy miracles!
Love,
Mandy
You know how sometimes you just sort of talk then wait your turn while someone else does? Then sometimes you have a conversation? You think new thoughts, learn new stuff, have a good laugh or two, share some useful information. The time flies by and you wish all of your friends could have been there.
This was one of those conversations and you can all listen in! Woo Hoo!
I'd love to know what you think so please leave comments.
Here's the link. Breakout to Miracles Radio Show
It will be archived so you can listen at your convenience in the next few days.
To many happy miracles!
Love,
Mandy
Tuesday, August 2, 2011
Do You Dare To Be Present?
I recently watched Todd Haynes’ “I’m Not There”. Extraordinary actors like Heath Ledger, Christian Bale, Cate Blanchett and Richard Gere create characters that represent different aspects of Bob Dylan’s life. The film explores the conflict between the ever-changing Dylan and outraged fans and critics who wanted to define him and keep him that way.
I can’t say I loved it. Can’t even recommend it. But it has stayed with me as a complex, rich lesson about being present in your life – often in conflict with other people’s expectations. It reminded me of a line from the est training, “Most likely you are perfect the way you are; you just keep acting the way you used to be.”
The more well known you are, the more success you achieve, the more people demand you “be” what they define you as. What is an operative word here because that way of relating to each other objectifies and depersonalizes us.
When you make healthy changes in your life or even totally transform some aspect of yourself it may require courage and patience to interact with friends, family, co-workers and fans who feel betrayed that you are not the same person they signed up to be with.
It can be painful, especially if you believe it’s wrong to be different today from how you were yesterday or last year – or for someone you love or work with to evolve into someone new. Consider the alternative. All creativity, life and growth exist only in the here and now. To keep acting the way we used to be chokes the life-force right out of us. It leaves us bored and frustrated or zombie-like.
It can be a great adventure to discover which relationships can flex and grow as we do and which ones cannot withstand the strain of the stretch.
I remember when I asked Doug Wilson, director to the wonderful Rowe Conference Center, to take ‘warm’ out of my bio. I didn’t want to be cold. I just didn’t want to attract people who functioned like heat-seeking missiles any more. Something shifted. Being clear and useful grew in importance. Being warm, not so much.
At 70, I’m becoming an old person. It’s very interesting. I’ve never been an old person before. When I am present with who and where I am now, it’s as exciting as any other phase of my life. When it doesn’t fit the way I used to be, I feel diminished, just less that I was.
Take a moment to pause. I will too. Notice what it is like to be you. Right here. Right now. Like you have never been before.
As shiver of excitement traveled through my body and remains tingling in my heart. What is happening with you?
Cheering you on to be here now.
With love,
Mandy
I can’t say I loved it. Can’t even recommend it. But it has stayed with me as a complex, rich lesson about being present in your life – often in conflict with other people’s expectations. It reminded me of a line from the est training, “Most likely you are perfect the way you are; you just keep acting the way you used to be.”
The more well known you are, the more success you achieve, the more people demand you “be” what they define you as. What is an operative word here because that way of relating to each other objectifies and depersonalizes us.
When you make healthy changes in your life or even totally transform some aspect of yourself it may require courage and patience to interact with friends, family, co-workers and fans who feel betrayed that you are not the same person they signed up to be with.
It can be painful, especially if you believe it’s wrong to be different today from how you were yesterday or last year – or for someone you love or work with to evolve into someone new. Consider the alternative. All creativity, life and growth exist only in the here and now. To keep acting the way we used to be chokes the life-force right out of us. It leaves us bored and frustrated or zombie-like.
It can be a great adventure to discover which relationships can flex and grow as we do and which ones cannot withstand the strain of the stretch.
I remember when I asked Doug Wilson, director to the wonderful Rowe Conference Center, to take ‘warm’ out of my bio. I didn’t want to be cold. I just didn’t want to attract people who functioned like heat-seeking missiles any more. Something shifted. Being clear and useful grew in importance. Being warm, not so much.
At 70, I’m becoming an old person. It’s very interesting. I’ve never been an old person before. When I am present with who and where I am now, it’s as exciting as any other phase of my life. When it doesn’t fit the way I used to be, I feel diminished, just less that I was.
Take a moment to pause. I will too. Notice what it is like to be you. Right here. Right now. Like you have never been before.
As shiver of excitement traveled through my body and remains tingling in my heart. What is happening with you?
Cheering you on to be here now.
With love,
Mandy
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