Unloading Burdens from the Past

There is no greater burden than a tool that is no longer useful. Yet most of us carry obsolete tools that served us in the past, all through our lives. They weigh us down. Every time we reach for a heavy, worn-out tool that worked long ago we rule out one that would work. We limit our chances for success today. It's kind of like trying to use smoke signals to get on the internet. You drag the wood in. You light the fire. You send the puffs up, just the way you learned, but nothing comes back and nobody clicks "like".

What keeps us reaching for something that hasn't worked for ages?

·         It's familiar. We know where to find it and what to do with it.

·         It worked before.  

·         It keeps us from having to face the unknown.

Unfortunately, many of the tools and strategies that saved us as children only hurt us as adults. Just like the proverbial trash, one person's burdensome tool can be someone else's treasured key to success.

Here are some examples of old tools and new possibilities

Defending your fears.

Explore them; perhaps they do not protect you from danger.

Getting  angry when you do not like what happens.

Focus on what you want instead. Ask for it. Reach for it.

Pleasing people you do not really enjoy being with.

Wish them well and release them to find someone who welcomes their company.

Holding a grudge.

If you can see that we are all doing the best we can with what we believe, it's easier to move on.

Feeling ashamed of failure.

Wear it as a bright badge of courage and learn from the research lab of life.

Doing everything yourself.

Ask for help when it enhances your project or your experience.

Always asking for help.

See if you can figure some of this out yourself; you'll be so proud!

Enduring pain you still feel from the past.

Ask what the experience means to you and uncover the beliefs you adopted that may not be true, even though you have lived by them as if they are real. Freedom from the pain of the past is possible!

Lighten up! When you unload burdens from your past, you open doors you may not know you closed. You can see opportunities and adventures where before there was only the gray fog of frustration, resignation or even despair. Miracles can come in if you let them.

What are some old beat-up, battered, heavy tools you carry around? Can you think of a replacement? Remember, any new tool may take some practice to master.

For more ways to breakout from the past, you can read my book, "Travelling Free: How to Recover from the Past by Changing Your Beliefs" now available in print, for Kindle and as a downloadable PDF e-book at http://mandyevans.com/archives/travelling-free/

To your en-lightened happiness and success!

Love,

Mandy

Does Someone Make A difference In Your Life?

An email arrived a few days ago from someone who read my segment in "The Secret" by Joe Vitale. It touched me deeply and reminded me of two important things:

1. Why I do what I do. Not so people can get a new car, or more money (though those are fine fun things to get) but so we can see what matters and share what we learn so we can have paradise on earth. Why not?
2. How important it is to acknowledge those who contribute to out lives and our world. If someone makes a difference in your life, tell them! Thanks them! Review their stuff! on Amazon or Trip Advisor. "Like" their posts. Send them a card. Find a way to let them know they matter because it will help them to weather the storms of harsh criticism and thrive for the benefit of us all.

Here's the email; someone struggled with a foreign language to deliver this eloquent message.

Thanks to Sara and to you for the wonderful contribution you make to so many live, especially mine!

Hello I wish,

I am from Slovakia.This is small country in Europe.I do not know English well so sorry for mistakes.I read key, the secret of all.I know that you are receiving such e-mails a lot but I want to thank you for what you do.You really helped me realize what is important in my life and make the first step to change themselves and gradually the world a better.

Thank you so much.

Sara

Sharing Happiness for My Birthday

My birthday is April 3and here's what I want:

To share happiness in all of it's amazing forms,

like curiosity, joy, rapture, bliss, peace, love,

ecstacy, wonder, awe!

I would like to contribute

to a happier you in a happier world.

So "How To Be Happy: Four Easy

Ways" goes public! Now on YouTube, no pass

word required. Here's the link.

http://mandyevans.com/how-to-be-happy-four-easy-ways/

The birthday gift I want most is for you to take

a look, share the link, and help me celebrate with happiness!

To Our Happiness!

Love,

Mandy

How to Be Happy Comments Welcome!

Comments on the "How to Be Happy: Four Easy Ways" video are welcome here!

To watch this short clip and lift your spirits click right here: How to Be Happy: 4 Easy Ways .

Have a Beautiful Friday

Wishing you a beautiful Friday, like the one here. Look what I saw when I looked out this morning. Anyone know if it's a heron or a crane?

Are You Afraid of Happiness?

You are all afraid to get caught being happy with  the wrong thing. --Bruce Di Marsico, founder of the Option Method.

Undetected like a stealth bomber, fear of happiness strikes when you least expect it. Since the fear of happiness is rarely recognized, it blocks an untold number of potentially wonderful experiences.

One reason I love teaching live workshops so much is the wisdom and insight the participants share during
and long after our time together.

This courageous message about fear of happiness comes from Andrea Schwarb, a coach who specializes in
simple, authentic living and professional resilience. She attended the Breakout Coach Training in Palm Springs last October.

"...false beliefs keep creeping in:

• If I am happy, I will be leaving the ones that I love.
• If I am happy, some people will feel abandoned, and they might want to kill themselves.
• If I am happy, others will try to knock me down at the knees.
• If I am happy, it won't last.
• I am not one of those types of people who can sustain happiness.
• Only others can be happy.
• If I am happy, some people will think "ewww....there's one of those happy people - can't be true - must be inauthentic"
• If I am happy, some may try to take me down, and I may have hurt feelings.
• If my feelings are hurt, I might cry, and then they will make fun of me and humiliate me for crying - for being a crybaby. 

I feel scared. Depression and despair are things I have always lived with. They are painful, but I know them well. They are like my security blanket. (strange, I know - picturing a stinky,dark "known" security blanket) - like THAT is keeping me safe and secure!

• I am afraid that if I am happy all of the time, I will lose touch with reality.
• I will be manic.
• I will scare people.

I want to continue on this journey of exploring what I enjoy, what pleases me, what I am happy doing. I
want to keep practicing self-authorization. And I want a good, cozy night's sleep."

A few weeks later Andrea reported that she was feeling happy, grateful, getting more hours in an interesting job, and beginning a new relationship. Woo Hoo!

Amazing, how discovering hidden fears and finding the beliefs that hold them in place can lead to a breakout
from a prison you may not even know confines you.

It takes some courage. It's good to have someone to cheer you on. It's wonderful to share the freedom and create new experiences.

Have you broken out from a prison of fear?
Your story can inspire others.

Are you stuck in fear? Especially fear of happiness?
Sharing your fear can open the door for a breakout.

Resource for overcoming fear of happiness: "Emotional Options: A Handbook for Happiness
http://mandyevans.com/archives/emotional-options/

Beliefs You Hold Like a Shield

"Women never get anywhere in the art world," she said. She always said that as if it explained why her beautiful paintings stood stacked in the corner of her barn. It was not true, but she held it in front of her like a shield. From what? From the hurt she feared would do her in if she ever dared to open her hungry heart and clenched fists and reach for the connections she yearned to make.

"Nice guys always finish last," he said when the woman withdrew her interest and affection. It was not true. It was not because he was nice. There were other reasons, as mysterious as the purpose of love.

These are examples of incredibly limiting "belief-lies" we humans hold like shields to protect us from the hurt that might just do us in, down for the count -- or forever.

If only it worked it might be worth the effort. There would be some benefit gained for the enormous expenditure of energy and vigilence. But belief-lie shields are only heavy, they do not protect. They only block the light.

My life's work has been finding, exploring, exposing those beliefs for the lies they are. I love helping people to find the courage to live without them. It does require some valor to put down a heavy shield and stand exposed before the glory of life with its infinite possibilities for creativity, love and joy.

I'm looking for new ways to connect with people who are ready to put down the shield and break out from the belief-lies that block happiness, success, and life. I welcome your thoughts. Will keep you posted!